He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You need a sexual gate keeper
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize