I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Well I just put wine in my tea
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
