As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize