Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize