I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
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