She's like a pop up book from hell.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
My ATM looks so different sober.
ttyl tear gas
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
This baby is an asshole
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
