It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
