this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He shit in the fireplace
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
