Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
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