I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Randomize
