I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize