At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
