Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
