This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
