Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
