my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Welp...herpes.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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