so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
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We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
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You need a sexual gate keeper
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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