In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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