You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
