AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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