It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
