My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
