I'm laying in your front yard are you home
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
