i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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