STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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