How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
