i may or may not be watching the land before time
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
