I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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