at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize