me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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