is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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