I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
