i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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