Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize