i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Randomize
