why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Randomize
