Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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