I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Randomize