this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Randomize