So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
