I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
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Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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