And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize