It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize