well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Im part way to drunk.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
