we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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