pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
