Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
