Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
