Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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