R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Ketchup is God's man juice
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
