jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize